Harpo, she's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.

You can't possibly hear the last movement of Beethoven's Seventh and go slow. (Oscar trying to talk his way out of a speeding ticket)

[Madame Nhu was] the Sandra Dee of South Vietnam. If I were cast on a desert island with her, I would quickly make friends with the natives.

I'm a study of a man in chaos in search of frenzy.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

Schizophrenia beats dining alone.

So little time and so little to do.