When I can't sleep, I read a book by Steve Allen.

I'm controversial. My friends either dislike me or hate me

It'd be nice to please everyone but I thought it would be more interesting to have a point of view.

So little time and so little to do.

I could never have a mistress, because I couldn't bear to tell the story of my life all over again.

I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients.

I never watch the Dinah Shore show- I'm a diabetic.