A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first.
I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away.
When I can't sleep, I read a book by Steve Allen.
I could never have a mistress, because I couldn't bear to tell the story of my life all over again.
A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.
Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you'll find the real tinsel underneath.