Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.

Marriage is a triumph of habit over hate.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away.

Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.

A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first.

Talent's like a baby. Wrap it up in wool and it goes to sleep.