The federal government spends millions to run the Postal Service. I could lose your mail for half of that.

Why should we tell kidnappers, murderers, and embezzlers their rights? If they don't know their rights, they shouldn't be in the business.

So I got into growing grapes, not realizing that there was a heck of a lot more to it than meets the eye.

I think I'd make a pretty good president, and they have a great pension plan.

We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.

It is true that all of the current presidential candidates once denied that they had any intention of running. But the fact that I am also a liar, doesn't make me a candidate.

The No. 1 cause of forest fires is trees.