We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.

We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.

In opposition to sex education: Let the kids today learn it where we did - in the gutter.

I read an article that said one in five Americans thinks Elvis is alive. I want to find those morons and get them registered to vote for me.

I'm often asked why I travel around the country talking politics. Is it for humanitarian reasons, community spirit, or is it for the money, the limousines or the girls? The answers are: no, no, yes yes yes!

Sex doesn't have to be taught. It's something most of us are born with.

Only 10 percent of the people in the U.S. like dry wines. You shouldn't get down on people just because they like a little sugar.