It is true that all of the current presidential candidates once denied that they had any intention of running. But the fact that I am also a liar, doesn't make me a candidate.

In opposition to sex education: Let the kids today learn it where we did - in the gutter.

The No. 1 cause of forest fires is trees.

It's tough campaigning, kissing hands and shaking babies.

No Taxes. Let's just tip the government 15% if they do a good job.

Marijuana should be licensed and kept out of the hands of teenagers. It's too good for them.

The federal government spends millions to run the Postal Service. I could lose your mail for half of that.