Why should old people get [Social Security]? They just sit around all day doing nothing.

Marijuana should be licensed and kept out of the hands of teenagers. It's too good for them.

Worrying about the future is a thing of the past. I don't think about it.

Many of you have asked why it's taken me so long to select a running mate. I have no intention of reaching into the political grab bag and grabbing any man to be my running mate. I'm going to reach in and grab a woman!

They said I ignored the drug problem. Well, I gave speeches on drugs, I wrote books on drugs. I did darn near everything on drugs!

Censorship does not interfere with the constitutional rights of every American to sit alone in a dark room in the nude and cuss.

I want to caucus in Iowa. I'll caucus all over the state. I don't caucus in California. You don't caucus where you live. It doesn't look good.