Marijuana should be licensed and kept out of the hands of teenagers. It's too good for them.

Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.

All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian.

Many of you have asked why it's taken me so long to select a running mate. I have no intention of reaching into the political grab bag and grabbing any man to be my running mate. I'm going to reach in and grab a woman!

It's tough campaigning, kissing hands and shaking babies.

I'm often asked why I travel around the country talking politics. Is it for humanitarian reasons, community spirit, or is it for the money, the limousines or the girls? The answers are: no, no, yes yes yes!

Actually, my wine was served at the White House twice. Reagan must have been asleep when he ordered it.