Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

Never go to bed angry, stay up and fight.

I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, 'Take off your clothes'?

My sister was so promiscuous she broke her ankle in the glove compartment of a car.

Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.

get married with the feeling it is going to last. Not like the bride I know who doubled the wedding cake recipe and froze one.

I realize it is normal to argue. I almost missed World War II watching my parents fight.