I don't know how you feel about old age... but in my case I didn't even see it coming. It hit me from the rear.

Remember there is no way you can give the father custody of the children without getting a divorce.

Every time I go near the stove, the dog howls.

If my jeans could talk, they'd plead for mercy.

It's true Fang and I fight, but we've never gone to bed mad. Of course, one year we were up for three months.

I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.

Isn't my fur stole pitiful? How unsuccessful can a girl look? People think I'm wearing anchovies. The worst of it is, I trapped these under my own sink.