I'm looking for a perfume to overpower men - I'm sick of karate.

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door greet him with, 'Who could have done this? We have no enemies!'

When you play spin the bottle, if they don't want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home.

Right from the start my parents had left me to fend for myself. Apparently unaware that I was a kid, they invariably treated me like an adult, perhaps because they themselves were no spring chickens.

Would you believe that I once entered a beauty contest? I must have been out of my mind. I not only came in last, I got 361 get-well cards.

I honestly believe there is absolutely nothing like going to bed with a good #book; or a friend who's #read one.

I was the world's ugliest baby. When I was born, the doctor slapped everybody.