Carry an oar when you drive. Three times I've ended up in water.
Doctors say it's okay to have sex after a heart attack, provided you close the ambulance door.
The best contraceptive for old people is nudity.
Your husband is lazy if when he leaves the house, he finds out which way the wind is blowing and goes that direction.
My sister-in-law is so skinny that she has a striped dress with only one stripe.
I never made `Who's Who,' but I'm featured in `What's That?'