When buying a new house ... Buy the house far enough away from school so your kids can't come home for lunch.
Never go to bed angry, stay up and fight.
I was in a beauty contest once. I not only came in last, I was hit in the mouth by Miss Congeniality.
My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle
It took me three weeks to stuff the turkey. I stuffed it through the beak.
Have you ever known anyone who bought a fruitcake for himself? Of course not. They are purchased as Christmas gifts, mostly for people you don't particularly like.