My house used to be haunted, but the ghosts haven't been back since the night I tried on all my wigs.

I was so wrinkled I could screw my hats on.

Think of me as a sex symbol for the men who don't give a damn.

I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.

I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.

If I wore a peek-a-boo dress, it would be like turning in a false alarm.

Isn't my fur stole pitiful? How unsuccessful can a girl look? People think I'm wearing anchovies. The worst of it is, I trapped these under my own sink.