It's an ill will that blows when you leave the hairdresser.

Your husband drinks too much if he says he never drinks alone, but considers the goldfish somebody.

Before you get married you should meet your fiance's parents. It is not enough that you like his parole officer.

They always say to Californians that we don't have seasons. Of course, that is not true. We have fire, flood, mud and drought.

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch."

I'm the woman who used to think that middle-age spread was a cocktail dip.

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning.