[On plastic surgery:] When I die, God won't know me. There are no two parts of my body the same age.
Phyllis DillerWhen I go to the beauty parlor, I always use the emergency entrance. Sometimes I just go for an estimate.
Phyllis DillerI've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui and Deepak Chopra but I find straight gin works best.
Phyllis Diller