Comedy is tragedy revisited or hostility. It is mock hostility, of course, or it would be ugly; we would have a war.
My body's in such bad shape I wear prescription underwear.
When I go to the beauty parlor, I always use the emergency entrance. Sometimes I just go for an estimate.
The only parts left of my original body are my elbows.
You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors!
I was in a beauty contest once. I not only came in last, I was hit in the mouth by Miss Congeniality.