All I ever learned at my mother's knee was what a bony knee looked like.
... if I invested in a mouthwash stock, bad breath would suddenly become popular.
By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.
When I go to the beach, even the tide won't come in.
My plastic surgeon ... said my face looked like a bouquet of elbows.
I am descended from a very long line my mother once foolishly listened to.