The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth.
I honestly believe there is absolutely nothing like going to bed with a good #book; or a friend who's #read one.
[When to have a facelift:] If you're tripping over your neck.
My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle
I'd love to slit my mother-in-law's corsets and watch her spread to death.
By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.