Have you ever known anyone who bought a fruitcake for himself? Of course not. They are purchased as Christmas gifts, mostly for people you don't particularly like.
I don't like to cook. I can make a TV dinner taste like radio.
Remember there is no way you can give the father custody of the children without getting a divorce.
I'm the woman who used to think that middle-age spread was a cocktail dip.
I'm looking for a perfume to overpower men - I'm sick of karate.
Fang can't stand to see trash & garbage lying around the house. He can't stand the competition.