The only parts left of my original body are my elbows.
When I go to the beauty parlor, I always use the emergency entrance. Sometimes I just go for an estimate.
Remarrying a husband you've divorced is like having your appendix put back in.
Remember, only a policeman is allowed to express himself on an expressway.
I finally had a ship tattooed to my chest. I wanted something on it.
When you play spin the bottle, if they don't want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home.