I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.

We Californians are constantly accused of not having seasons, but we do. We have fire, flood, mud, and drought.

You want to look younger... rent smaller children.

This man I was going with asked me for my finger measurements. I thought he was going to buy me a ring for Christmas, but he gave me a bowling ball.

My eight-year-old bought a bicycle with the money he saved by not smoking.

Life began on this planet when the first amoeba split. Mankind will still be seeking God, not accepting that God is a spirit; can't see it, touch it, only feel it. It's called LOVE.

I don't know how you feel about old age... but in my case I didn't even see it coming. It hit me from the rear.