Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they are born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.

Failure-it centers me. Too much success has me thinking, All right, what's goin' on?

My career has been my craziest adventure.

Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they are born and they start using sleep deprivation to break you.

I did 15 shows a week when I lived in New York. I did five shows on a Friday and seven shows on a Saturday. It was everything I did and it was my sole source of income.

I have this mistress: show business.

You have to remember: the wife been home all day cleaning asses and feeding faces. Sometimes the opposite.