I'd rather be in Las Vegas 104 degrees than New York 90 degrees, you know why? Legalized prostitution. In any weather that takes the edge off.

I have the show because I'm insecure. It's my insecurity that makes me want to be a comic, that makes me need the audience.

I like doing film, you know, single-camera.

You know, before I would think, my cab driver hates me. Now I think my limo driver hates me.

Whenever I walk off the golf course, I thank God that I'm able to tell a joke. I thank God I'm good at something.

The only thing I miss from the sitcom format is that immediate gratification of when you're, if we're talking about comedy, of the live audience.

I married a saint - well, a saint who curses.