I'd rather be in Las Vegas 104 degrees than New York 90 degrees, you know why? Legalized prostitution. In any weather that takes the edge off.

It's starting to feel good, although I don't like feeling too good - that's not where my comedy comes from.

My kids are growing up and it's hard to accept they are their own person and they're independent.

You don't want to shock them and do something totally opposite, but you also want to play a different character.

When you go to standup, there seems to be a common denominator of some form of need or want for validation from the audience that maybe you were lacking as a kid.

You might think that's an exaggeration but believe me, if you leave twin two-year-olds alone in your living room, at some point a cow will be airborne.

That's the one thing I have over any twenty-one-year-old: a proud history of accumulated neuroses. That's the game in which I'm da man.