Orson Welles, who said to Anita Bryant, Stop picketing me. What I said was I was a thespian. Never got a dinner!

Bluebeard, who said to Scottland Yard, How do I know how many wives I've killed? I'm not an accountant! Never got a dinner!

Dr. Spock, who said, Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. Never got a dinner!

Vincent Van Gogh, who said to the hat salesman, I like it, but it keeps sliding over my ear. Never got a dinner!

Dolly Parton, who said to her doctor, Are you sure it's a chest cold? Never got a dinner!

Goliath's mother, who said to Goliath, Stop running around with David! You're always coming home stoned! Never got a dinner!

Jack the Ripper's mother, who said to Jack, How come I never see you with the same girl twice? Never got a dinner!