Ponce de Leon, who said when he discovered the Fountain of Youth, Where the hell are the paper cups? Never got a dinner!

Peter Minuet, who said to the Indians in modern-day Manhattan, Will you accept a check from a Puerto Rican bank? Never got a dinner!

Moshe Dayan, who donated his eye to CBS. Never got a dinner!

Nostradamus, who predicted that Billy Bailey would not come home. Never got a dinner!

Sleeping Beauty, who said to Prince Charming, Are you sure all we did was kiss? Never got a dinner!

Alexander the Great, who said on his wedding night, It's only a nickname. Never got a dinner!

Ninety isn't old. You're old when your doctor doesn't X-ray you any more - he just holds you up to the light!