Eve said to the serpent, “You know I could go for a bite to eat, but I don't know you from Adam.”

Sonny Von Bulow, who said to her husband Claus on their honeymoon, Stop needling me. Never got a dinner!

Sure, I've gotten old. I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees... I've fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, and take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. I have bouts with dementia, poor circulation, hardly feel my hands or feet anymore, can't remember if I'm 85 or 92, but... thank God, I still have my Florida driver's license!

Amelia Earhart, who said, Stop looking for me; see if you can find my luggage! Never got a dinner!

The Puerto Rican doctor, who wrote all his prescriptions with spray paint. Never got a dinner!

Gandhi, who went to Wendy's and asked, "Where's the belief?" Never got a dinner!

Uncle Remus, who said to Uncle Ben, You're a credit to your rice. Never got a dinner!