Lot, who said to his wife as she was being turned into a pillar of salt, Stop shaking! Never got a dinner!

Ray Charles, who said to Stevie Wonder, Maybe we're white. Never got a dinner!

Clint Eastwood's sex therapist, who said to Clint, Do it any which way you can, but no sudden impact. Never got a dinner!

E.T., who said to Phyllis Diller, You look weird. Never got a dinner!

Long John Silver's wife, Short, who said to John, If the shoe fits... Never got a dinner!

Orville Wright said to his brother, "Wilbur, you were only in the air for 12 seconds. How could my luggage be in Cleveland?"

The captain of the Titanic, who said to room service, Who sent for all this ice? Never got a dinner!