The captain of the Titanic, who said to room service, Who sent for all this ice? Never got a dinner!

Jacques Cousteau, the last man to see Jimmy Hoffa. Never got a dinner!

Joseph Cotten, who said, You know how I got my name? Sammy Davis picked it for me. Never got a dinner!

Burt Reynolds, great sex symbol of the movies, who said, I owe it all to one great part. Never got a dinner!

George Burns, what a man. He read in the paper that it takes ten dollars a year to support a kid in India. So he sent his kids there.

Dracula, who said while they drove a wooden stake into his heart, Boy, I sure hope this is heartburn. Never got a dinner!

Maid Marion, who said to Robin Hood, I will not live in a house with a Little John. Never got a dinner!