If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas

I consider the television set as the American fireplace, around which the whole family will gather.

I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise.

If by chance some day you're not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I've said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled.

Wouldn't it be a pity if someone said that is a prayer and that would be eliminated from schools, too?

I won't mind dying if I can tell St. Peter a joke he hasn't heard.