Married or Single? There is no good choice. It's like when your doctor says, 'Ointment?' or 'Suppositories'?

Seventy-five percent of all Americans believe that angels are real. Which is amazing when you consider that forty percent of all Americans think DNA evidence is unreliable.

We spend the second half of our life making up for the first half.

When one guy sees an invisible man he's a nut case; ten people see him it's a cult; ten million people see him it's a respected religion.

Married or Single? There is no good choice. It's like when your doctor says, 'Ointment?' or 'Suppositories'?

There is no romance without some lying. That's what romance is - a little bit of Vaseline on the camera lens of life.

Lobsters one of the only animals that have to put up with being alive in the restaurant. If you go to a steakhouse, folks - no cow tank.