Impulse buying is not macho. Men rarely call the Home Shopping Network.

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

My mother was the worst cook ever. In school, when we traded lunches, I had to throw in an article of clothing.

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?

I never panic when I get lost. I just change where it is I want to go.

I'll never understand why people go to movie theaters to have conversations. Going to the movies to talk is like going to a restaurant to cook. The idea is that you have paid your money to have someone do something better than you can do it yourself.

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?