My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.

All men would still really like to own a train set.

Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"

I love to sleep. Do you? Isn't it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and unconscious.

The logic was, there weren't too many female comedians, so I thought I might as well try a field that had fewer competitors than the field I was in, which was acting, singing and dancing.

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo.