Men forget everything; women remember everything. That's why men need instant replay in sports. They've already forgotten what's happened.

Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

I don't like when there's too much conversation because I'm shy and it makes me uncomfortable.

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.

My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.