Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.
Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying
I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself "well, that's not going to happen
Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.
One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.
At the end of every year, I add up the time that I have spent on the phone on hold and subtract it from my age. I don't count that time as really living. I spend more and more time on hold each year. By the time I die, I'm going to be quite young.