Buying something on sale is a very special feeling. In fact, the less I pay for something, the more it is worth to me. I have a dress that I paid so little for that I am afraid to wear it. I could spill something on it, and then how would I replace it for that amount of money?

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

My new dress. Do you like it? It's from my favorite designer, On Sale.

At the end of every year, I add up the time that I have spent on the phone on hold and subtract it from my age. I don't count that time as really living. I spend more and more time on hold each year. By the time I die, I'm going to be quite young.

I love to sleep. Do you? Isn't it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and unconscious.

If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

I'm not sure if my husband is going to be there when I actually have the baby. He said the only way he's going to be in the room when there's a delivery is if there's a pizza involved.