Her idea of a romantic setting is one that has a diamond in it. If you feel the need to marry a doctor, I suggest a dermatologist. Good hours, free Retin-A.

Commitment is different in males and females. In females it is a desire to get married and raise a family. In males it means not picking up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

If you like easygoing, monogamous men, stay away from billionaires.

I'm going to start water skiing someday...as soon as I can separate it from being dragged by a boat.

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?

Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.