The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.

Men do cry, but only when assembling furniture.

Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.

My parents were glad to see that my new husband looks like a 'regular guy'-no earring or anything. But really I think a man with an earring is better prepared for marriage. I mean, he's already experienced pain and bought jewelry.

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.

Men don't live well by themselves. They don't even live like people. They live like bears with furniture.