Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

My cousin just got married for the totally wrong reasons. She married a man for money. She wasn't real subtle about it. Instead of calling him her fiancé, she kept calling him her financee.

Women are more accommodating. If a woman drinks the last glass of apple juice in the refrigerator, she'll make more apple juice. If a man drinks the last glass of apple juice, he'll just put back the empty container.

My mother was the worst cook ever. In school, when we traded lunches, I had to throw in an article of clothing.

Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.

All men look nerdy in black socks and sandals.

Men don't mature. Marry a younger one.