Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

In high school I was voted the girl most likely to become a nun. That may not be impressive to you, but it was quite an accomplishment at the Hebrew Academy.

I'm going to start water skiing someday...as soon as I can separate it from being dragged by a boat.

I love to sleep. Do you? Isn't it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and unconscious.

Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying

I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups.

Men don't feel the urge to get married as quickly as women do because their clothes all button and zip in the front. Women's dresses usually button and zip in the back. We need men emotionally and sexually, but we also need men to help us get dressed.