Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him

Men who tell you they read the Ann Summers catalogue for the articles are lying

If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.

Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.

You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.