Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible; in a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.

The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.

Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.

Husband: a man who buys his football tickets four months in advance and waits until the day before his anniversary to buy his wife a gift.

Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.

I don't look back. I'm like a shark - I only look forward.