When men break up they want to remain friends. Why? Why can't they just get lost?

All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

I want to have young children although my mother and father are even now young sufficient to just take care of them.

Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers." And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it." I didn't know what to do. I'd knock on people's doors and go, "Trick or treat."

Good weather all the week, but come the weekend the weather stinks. When the weather is too hot they complain, too cold they complain, and when it's just right, they're watching TV.