Be careful of men who are bald and rich; the arrogance of "rich" usually cancels out the nice of "bald".

My Vegas act is how I make my money.

Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?

Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.

You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.

Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code... he turned himself in.