Don't try to teach men how to do anything in public. They can learn in private; in public they have to know.

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"

I hate learning through experience. Just once I'd like to learn something because someone was nice enough to tell me in advance.

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: 'This looks much better on.' On what? On fire?

I have too many credit cards. You know what happened? Someone stole one and I didn't notice. I noticed when I got that bill. Whoa! It was so much less! I'm letting him keep it. I'm saving money!

No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.