Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, "Are we going to have sex again?" He said, "Yes, but not with each other."

If it's attention you want, don't get involved with a man during play-off season.

How can I have morning sickness when I don't get up till noon?

Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.

I just love dogs, and there really is no better companion than an animal.

I can see close up and my husband can see far away, so we're covered. He tells me who's in the movie and I tell him what's in his sandwich. Together we're human bifocals.

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.