Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.

I'm a very simple person. I'm very shallow. Shallow, simple, easily pleased: that's me.

I don't want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I'll just make you laugh.

Men will now get up and walk with the baby in the middle of the night, change its diapers, and give it a bottle, but in their heart of hearts they still think they shouldn't have to.

Individuality in dressing is not important to men. If they all look alike it means they haven't made a mistake.

My parents always told me I could do anything, but never told me how long it would take

Waiters and waitresses are becoming nicer and much more caring. I used to pay my check, they would say "Thank you." That's now escalated into "You care care of yourself, now." The other day I paid my check and the waiter said, "Don't put off that mammogram."