Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.

If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr. Right," if he a) got older, b) got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.

A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

Men do cry, but only when assembling furniture.

My parents always told me I could do anything, but never told me how long it would take

Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a man walk into a party and say "Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo.

The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new theory is men don't mature. Marry a younger one.