I adore being hitched. It's so extraordinary to discover one unique individual you need to irritate for whatever remains of your life.

Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.

Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types: depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not nerdy.

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.

When you're a dancer, you start with the basics. You don't all of a sudden do a grand jete and pirouette. You start with first position, second, third.

I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.